Cunnilingus and Menopause: What Changes, What Helps, and How to Increase Comfort

Published on August 29, 2025 at 2:29 AM
elderly woman wearing curlers in her hair eating a ginder bread cookie

Menopause brings a variety of physical and hormonal changes that can affect sexual experiences, including cunnilingus. Understanding these changes and learning how to adapt can help maintain intimacy and pleasure during this stage of life.

 

What Changes During Menopause

Hormonal shifts during menopause, primarily the decrease in estrogen, can lead to vaginal dryness, thinning of the vulvar tissue, and reduced blood flow. These changes may cause discomfort or sensitivity during oral sex. Additionally, some women experience decreased libido or changes in sensation, which can affect their enjoyment of cunnilingus.

What Helps to Increase Comfort

  1. Use Lubrication: Water-based lubricants can alleviate dryness and reduce friction, making oral sex more comfortable. Avoid flavored or scented lubricants that might irritate sensitive tissue.
  2. Take Time for Foreplay: Longer periods of arousal help increase natural lubrication and blood flow, enhancing comfort and pleasure.
  3. Explore Different Positions: Some positions may reduce pressure or allow better control of stimulation, improving comfort.
  4. Communicate Openly: Sharing preferences and feedback with a partner ensures that both feel respected and satisfied.
  5. Consider Vaginal Estrogen: For some, low-dose vaginal estrogen prescribed by a healthcare provider can improve tissue health and reduce dryness.

How to Increase Pleasure

  • Focus on gentle, varied stimulation rather than intensity, as sensitive tissue may respond better to softer touch.
  • Incorporate other erogenous zones such as the inner thighs or nipples to enhance arousal.
  • Mindfulness and relaxation techniques can heighten awareness and enjoyment of sensations.
  • Experiment with temperature play, such as warm breath or cool touches, to add new sensations without causing irritation.

Menopause does not have to signal an end to enjoyable oral sex. With patience, communication, and some adjustments, many women find cunnilingus remains a pleasurable and intimate part of their sexual lives.

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